Chapter 5

Talking about Home and Family

In This Chapter

Describing home life

Talking about family

Talking about where you live and your family is a great way to open the lines of communication to a new acquaintance. In this chapter, I take you on a tour of the rooms in the home and provide useful information on German domestic lifestyles. You also find out about names of family members and how to talk about them.

Living in an Apartment or House

A far greater number of Germans live in apartments, either rented or owned, than do North Americans, and great value is placed on being able to own a single family dwelling. Land and construction materials are very costly, so living quarters tend to be smaller and more energy efficient.

Describing life within four walls

Here’s some basic vocabulary you need to know to describe rooms in a home, along with a few other residence-related details:

das Bad/das Badezimmer (dâs baht/dâs bah-de-tsi-mer) (bathroom)

der Balkon (dêr bâl-kon) (balcony)

die Eigentumswohnung (dee ay-gên-tooms-vohn-oong) (condominium)

das Einfamilienhaus (dâs ayn-fâ-mi-lee-en-hous) (single family home)

das Esszimmer (dâs ês-tsi-mer) (dining room)

der Garten (dêr gâr-ten) (yard/garden)

der Keller (dêr kêl-er) (basement)

die Küche (dee kueH-e) (kitchen)

die Mietwohnung (dee meet-vohn-oong) (rented apartment)

das Reihenhaus (dâs ray-ên-hous) (townhouse)

das Schlafzimmer (dâs shlahf-tsi-mer) (bedroom)

die Wohnung (dee vohn-oong) (apartment)

das Wohnzimmer (dâs vohn-tsi-mer) (living room)

das Zimmer (dâs tsi-mer) (room)

Asking the right questions

Nothing is more embarrassing than being a guest in someone’s home and making a blunder because you’re not sure how to ask (and respond to) some simple questions.

The bathroom/toilet issue

You may find yourself in an uncomfortable situation if you ask to use the Badezimmer (bad-e-tsi-mer) (bathroom), when what you’re probably looking for, believe it or not, is die Toilette (dee toy-lêt-e) (the toilet). So what’s the story? Well, first, Germans have no hang-ups about using the T-word.

In addition, what constitutes a “bathroom” in German homes differs from the definition you’re probably accustomed to. In Germany, the bathroom is a room where you can take a bath or shower, but it may or may not have a toilet. The toilet may be located in a separate room, euphemistically described in real-estate lingo as a half-bath. You, the guest, are probably not interested in taking a shower in the Badezimmer. So to avoid any confusion, whatever the plumbing situation may be, here’s what you actually need to ask:

Darf ich ihre Toilette benutzen? (dârf iH eer-e toy-lêt-e be-noots-en?) (May I use the bathroom? Literally: May I use the toilet?)

At the dinner table

Table etiquette in German-speaking countries involves a couple of polite phrases at the start of the meal, as well as appropriate eating customs. Before beginning a meal, it’s customary to say Guten Appetit (gooh-ten âp-e-teet) (enjoy your meal) or its more informal version, Mahlzeit (mâl-tsayt) (enjoy your meal). You may also hear Mahlzeit used as a means of greeting colleagues at the workplace around the lunchtime. People gathered around a dinner table also use the phrase zum Wohl (tsoom vohl) (cheers) as they raise their glasses before taking the first sip of something like wine. Prost (prohst) (cheers) is an alternative expression more typically associated with drinking only.

Table manners in the German-speaking world deem it polite to have both hands on the table, but not the elbows. In fact, it would be considered strange to keep one hand hidden in one’s lap. (No funny business, please, under the table!) By the same token, eating with your fork while still holding your knife in the other hand is acceptable.

During meal preparation, if you’d like to offer your help, by all means do so. You may use either the formal or informal version of “you.” First, the formal “you” formulation:

Kann ich Ihnen helfen? (kân iH een-en hêlf-en?) (Can I help you?)

The informal “you” version looks like this:

Kann ich dir helfen? (kân iH deer hêlf-en?) (Can I help you?)

In another situation, you may be offered something (more) to eat or drink. Check out the question and some replies:

Darf/Kann ich Ihnen . . . anbieten? (dârf/kân iH een-en . . . ân-beet-en?) (May/Can I offer you. . . ?)

Ja, bitte. Ich möchte . . . . (yah, bi-te. iH merH-te . . . .) (Yes, please. I’d like . . . .)

Danke, nein. (dân-ke, nayn.) (No, thank you.)

Talking about Your Family

Discussing your family, die Familie (dee fâ-mee-lee-e) is a great way to get to know someone. Some people may even feel prompted to show their photos of family members. However, talking at great length about little Gretchen and Hansi, Jr. is a far less popular pastime in Germany than in America. It just may have to do with the value Germans place on privacy. At any rate, another reason you’re not likely to fall asleep gazing at endless baby pictures is that the birth rate in Germany is very low.

You should find all the members of your family tree in the following list. Even if you don’t have kids or in-laws, it’s good to be familiar with these words so that you recognize them when discussing someone else’s family (see Figure 5-1):

der Bruder (dêr brooh-der) (brother)

der Cousin (dêr kooh-zen) (male cousin)

die Cousine (dee kooh-zeen-e) (female cousin)

die Eltern (dee êl-tern) (parents)

die Frau (dee frou) (woman/wife)

die Geschwister (dee ge-shvis-ter) (siblings)

die Großeltern (dee grohs-êl-tern) (grandparents)

die Großmutter (dee grohs-moot-er) (grandmother)

der Großvater (dêr grohs-fah-ter) (grandfather)

der Junge (dêr yoong-e) (boy)

die Kinder (dee kin-der) (children, kids)

das Mädchen (dâs maid-Hên) (girl)

der Mann (dêr mân) (man/husband)

die Mutter (dee moot-er) (mother)

der Onkel (dêr on-kel) (uncle)

die Schwester (dee shvês-ter) (sister)

der Sohn (dêr zohn) (son)

die Tante (dee tân-te) (aunt)

die Tochter (dee toH-ter) (daughter)

der Vater (dêr fah-ter) (father)

Use the following words for the in-laws:

der Schwager (dêr shvah-ger) (brother-in-law)

die Schwägerin (dee shvai-ger-in) (sister-in-law)

die Schwiegereltern (dee shvee-ger-êl-tern) (parents-in-law)

die Schwiegermutter (dee shvee-ger-moot-er) (mother-in-law)

der Schwiegersohn (dêr shvee-ger-zohn) (son-in-law)

die Schwiegertochter (dee shvee-ger-toH-ter) (daughter-in-law)

der Schwiegervater (dêr shvee-ger-fah-ter) (father-in-law)

To express the term “step-,” you use the prefix Stief- with the name of the relative, like this example: Stiefbruder (steef-brooh-der) (step-brother). The term for a “half” relative uses the prefix Halb-, so half-sister looks like this: Halbschwester (hâlp-shvês-ter).

Saying that you have a certain type of relative involves the following simple phrase:

Ich habe einen/eine/ein. . . . (îH hah-be ayn-en/ayn-e/ayn. . . .) (I have a. . . .)

The correct form of the indefinite article einen (masculine)/eine (feminine)/ein (neuter) (ayn-en/ayn-e/ayn) (a) depends on both gender and case. In the preceding phrase, you’re using the accusative (direct object) case. The feminine and the neuter indefinite articles happen to be the same in the nominative (subject) case and the accusative (direct object) case, so their spelling doesn’t change. The masculine indefinite article, however, takes a different form in the accusative. Here’s how it works:

Masculine nouns: Nouns like der Mann, der Bruder, der Garten (dêr gâr-ten) (garden), and der Balkon (dêr bâl-kon) (balcony) use the form einen.

Feminine nouns: Nouns, like die Frau, die Tochter, die Wohnung (dee vohn-oong) (apartment), and die Küche (dee kueH-e) (kitchen) use eine.

Neuter nouns: Nouns like das Mädchen, das Haus (dâs house [as in English]) (house), and das Wohnzimmer (dâs vohn-tsi-mer) (living room) use ein.

So what do you do if you want to express that you don’t have siblings, a dog, a house, or whatever it may be? In English, you would say “I don’t have any siblings/a dog/a house.”

In German, you just use the negative, accusative form of the indefinite article einen/eine/ein, which you form by adding the letter k to the beginning of the word like this: keinen/keine/kein (kayn-en/kayn-e/kayn) (no). Look at the negative, accusative forms in the following sentences:

Masculine nouns: Masculine nouns, such as der Schwiegervater, use keinen: Ich habe keinen Schwiegervater. (iH hah-be kayn-en shvee-ger-fah-ter.) (I don’t have a father-in-law.)

Feminine nouns: Feminine nouns, such as die Familie, use keine: Ich habe keine große Familie. (iH hah-be kayn-e groh-se fâ-mi-lee-e.) (I don’t have a large family.)

Neuter nouns: Neuter nouns, such as das Haus, use kein: Ich habe kein Haus. (iH hah-be kayn house.) (I don’t have a house.)

Plural nouns: Nouns in their plural form, or those that are always plural, like die Geschwister, use keine: Ich habe keine Geschwister. (iH hah-be kayn-e ge-shvis-ter.) (I don’t have any siblings.)

Talkin’ the Talk

Fun & Games

Name the rooms of the house that are illustrated in the following drawing.

A. ____________________________________________________________________

B. ____________________________________________________________________

C. ____________________________________________________________________

D. ____________________________________________________________________

E. ____________________________________________________________________